Showgirls

SPOILERS!

For much of its two hour plus running time, 1995's SHOWGIRLS aggressively claws its way toward the Bad Movie Pantheon.  So much to consider.  Former Saved by the Bell starlet Elizabeth Berkley's non-acting.  Joe Esztherhas' incredible, mostly lewd dialogue.  Near constant nudity.  Random character behavior and motivations.  The ketchup scene.  I could go on and on.

But then that last half hour, when things get all, what? Sentimental! Didn't see that coming.  Did the filmmakers grow a conscience somewhere underneath all the glitter and boobs? Events that are supposed to tug at our heartstrings? Have us feel badly for Gina Gershon's ultra catty and evil character, the star attraction at the Stardust Casino? Didn't jive for me.

Up to that point, I spent the movie facepalming and laughing heartily, certain that director Paul Verhoeven's film was truly the trash classic its reputation suggested.  Unsurprisingly, this film has its loyal cult.  I have championed a bad film or two (STUDENT BODIES, THE ROOM) in my day but SHOWGIRLS is just a long, ponderous (and unsexy) mess.   Just another cliched backstage drama that fills its story with potentially interesting characters, gives them a few pretty good scenes, then leaves them dangling.  I cite Alan Rachins.  Remember him, that smarmy bald guy from L.A. Law? Here he sports a large toupee and plays Tony, a smarmy producer at the Stardust.  His best line to Nomi (Berkeley) when he, um, demands she show a little perk with her nipples  - "I'm erect.  Why aren't you?"  He's fast talking and brash, but the film ultimately diminishes him in later scenes.

Then there's poor Klye McLachlan as Zack, entertainment director at the Stardust and Cristal's (Gershon) main squeeze.  He seems like a nice guy but then stereotypically reveals himself to be just another show biz scumbag.  His acting isn't bad, but his role is one dimensional.  The actor has been open in his dismissal of SHOWGIRLS, stating that you know the film is bad from the first scene.  Then it keeps getting worse.  He says it all.

Maybe there's some sociologic thesis to be derived from this film.  Verhoeven has made some scholarly observations in films like ROBOCOP and even STARSHIP TROOPERS.  His work is always audacious and scandalous in some fashion, but this time the result is merely cheap (though big budgeted), stupid, and even boring for stretches. Was he really trying to be satiric here? Some moments support that, many others are arguable.  Maybe someone could  just create a highlight reel of the best moments, many of which involve Lin Tucci as Henrietta "Mama" Bazoom.   It would save you, even the most undiscrimnating of you, a lot of wasted time.  Gotta appreciate that final shot, though.