15 Years?!

Has it really been 15 years since I began this blog? 2007 feels like a few lifetimes ago.  When I posted those sparse, hesitant words at the beginning of this "adventure" my mother had just begun the rehabilitation that never came to pass.  I was a year and a half from becoming an audiologist.  Two years from getting married.  And three years from making a big discovery about my identity that I never did reveal to you, invisible audience.  Sorry for that.  There were and are sensitivities about this being shared publicly, though with time they become less salient.  I would stay tuned if I were you....

From time to time I reread those early entries.  So much more personal than most of what I churn out these days.  The voice behind them is still recognizable, still very much "me."  I like to believe I've grown since then.  I've certainly learned a few things, gained wider perspective.  I've also observed myself becoming more irritable, less patient.  Some days I feel like I've morphed from Anakin Skywalker into Darth Vader.  It's disturbing.   And a paradox of sorts - I've become less concerned if others don't like me for who I am, yet at times am quietly devastated by that.  It always goes back to rebounding afterward, reclaiming that freedom.  That has become easier, certainly more so than when I was younger.

This whole blog business began after the encouragement of a childhood friend named Dan, who has lived in Southern California for the past few decades.  His cyber musings were almost exclusively about how he has dealt with being adopted, and the lifelong quest to find his biological mother.  As a postscript, he finally did a few years back and thankfully had a happy reunion.  For Lamplight Drivel, I spoke a little about myself in those first postings but found it was more fun to write about movies, music, restaurants, and audiology.  Which reminds me - we're due for another "Your Audiology Tutorial", eh? 

I used to do series posts.  Series about bands, undergrad, my pharmacy years.  There are two mammoth series I can do recounting the days in grad school and my current workplace, where I have served for nearly 13 years and counting.  But I think more time needs to pass.  If I'm honest in those writings they will be deeply personal.  That's getting harder as I age. 

My persona usually comes out in my movie reviews, which accounts for a large percentage of the content here.  I've written about movies since my early teens.  Back then they were just capsules, summaries.  My first full length review was written for my "Understanding Motion Pictures" class in college, I believe for THE GODS MUST BE CRAZY or THE PRODUCERS.  I just sorta picked up that baton for this blog, and writing these amateur reviews enhances the experience of film appreciation for me.  Gives permanent life to films that would otherwise largely evaporate from memory.  

I will do a more comprehensive retrospective for the 20 year.  Imagine how much wiser I will be by then!